Sunday, August 13, 2006

The Things We Do For Love

You know he'll never forgive himself if he passes up this opportunity. It's something he just has to do. And you want more than anything for him to be happy. So you support him. He's already thought things out pretty thoroughly, so you can just sit back and not worry your pretty little head. But you both know that's not in your nature. It's still weeks away, and already your stomach is in knots.

Excitement mingles with fear. It woud be so awesome for this to actually happen. But then, what if it does? Can your finances survive throughout the process? Certainly not on your meager paycheck alone.

But that's not the only concern you have. Sure, if he makes it you have the financial stuff to worry about. But what if he doesn't? What if he's not what they are looking for? You know he's amazing and incredibly talented, but what if he just doesn't have the right genre of talent? You know he can handle the let-down. But can you? You have dealt with disappointment before (who hasn't?). But you also know just how painful that disappointment can be when you already had your hopes up. And you can't stop yourself from getting your hopes up. If he doesn't make it, he's going to need you there for him. Who's going to be there for you when it all comes tumbling down?

How selfish is that - making this all about you? It's not about you at all. It's all about him. But when you love someone this much, anything that has any effect on him at all is suddenly about you, too. It's inescapable.

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