Cat Lady: The Beginning

The following conversation took place this evening in the car as we left the temporary apartment and headed to our apartment. Continue reading at your own risk - you are about to witness the insanity that is my mind.

: MEOW.

: I know, sweetie. We're on our way home now.

: MEOW.

: Really?

: Meow.

: Go on.

: Meow...meow.

: That's nice.

(Pause)

: MEEOOWW!

: No, we're not there yet, but soon.

: MEOW!

: Not yet.

: MEOW!

: Yes, this is our parking space. Welcome home!

Tucker's Got Talent

I don't know percentages...

Oh. My. Goodness.

do I have a sick sense of humor?

I didn't get a picture of it, but I saw a bottle of Skin So Soft lotion at my mom's house that really made my laugh out loud.

It was "Age Defying Body Lotion."

With a label in French as well.

"Lotion pour le corps"

Does anyone else find it as amusing as I did that "Age-defying" and "corps" (even without the "e") were on the same bottle?

Maybe I'm just weird.

Well, I know I'm weird, but maybe this is one of those things that only I see.

one of the greatest Christmas songs EVAR

It's the most wonderful day of the year!

Happy Day of the Ninja!!!

Visit Ask a Ninja for all your ninja-related ponderings.

Santa's Moonlighting

I know how Santa spends his time in the off-season.

He's a greeter at our WalMart.

I swear it's true.

Snow white beard and hair, rosy cheeks, always smiling - it's him. I know it.

I would have accompanied this revelation with photographic evidence, but I didn't want to end up on his naughty list.

On Watermelon

"I don't like the green part...it tastes like grass."

America's Got IQ

Congratulations, Terry Fator. You are an amazing entertainer and I absolutely adore you.

I love my job!

Jordayn makes an adorable genie, don't you think?

good question

This is Z's last week at preschool. He's getting ready to start kindergarten, and his parents have found someone else (read: cheaper and willing to pick him up from school so he won't have to ride the bus) to keep him after school, so they want to start getting him used to her and her place.

Now, Z has been in my class for 2 years. I've only had about 4 months as a preschool teacher without him in my class. Well, last week I started saying things like "what am I going to do without a Z in my class?" and "I won't know how to take care of a class without a Z in it!"

Friday afternoon on the playground, Z came up to me and sat in my lap in the swing and said "What am I going to do without my Ms Amber to tell me what to do?"

how does he come up with this stuff?

This story requires a bit of setup. I work at a preschool with a school-age summer program. The building that the school-age class and both 4-year old classes are in is just one big open room - no walls between the three classes. And we share 1 girls' bathroom and 1 boys' bathroom.

Today I took my class to the bathroom, as is our habit before heading off to the playground. Because I don't want to spend the entire recess standing in the doorway so that I can supervise a playground and a bathroom at the same time. Anyway, Z was messing with the keyboard from the school-age music center (which is right next to the bathrooms) and I said "Z, please don't touch that." He came back with a smartmouth mimic and I gave him the "I know you didn't just do that" look. Then Z did the funniest thing.

He stuck his finger out like he was going to scold someone and then turned it to his mouth as he said, "Mouth, don't say that! Ms Amber is my teacher!"

For Your Viewing Pleasure...

Surely by now you've all heard about the Dramatic Prairie Dog that has taken YouTube by storm (though you may have heard of him as the Dramatic Chipmunk). Evidently the footage was originally taken from a Japanese children's show and has since been altered to pay homage to a slew of cinematic masterpieces. Or just to make funny little video clips. Here are my favorites:

Kill Bill

James Bond

Curses

Dr Evil

Busted by the RIAA

Twilight Zone

great auditions on Last Comic Standing

These are a few of my favorite sets from this season's auditions.

Arj Barker

Lawrence Mooney

Debra DiGiovanni

Enjoy. Or don't. Whatever.

Youtube Grab Bag

I intended to have more of my favorite acts from AGT and LCS, but youtube let me down! And what happened to the categories on youtube? I can't browse videos by genre anymore? Anyway, here are a few of the things that made me smile in the last week.

18 year old ventriloquist on America's Got Talent

Gerry Dee auditions for Last Comic Standing

Music video for Virus Alert by Weird Al

things you just don't see around here

I'm almost done going on about the vacation, but there were a couple of things that I saw in Destin that I had never seen anywhere else before.

Now this sign seems like it would belong perfectly in the somewhat redneck areas in which I have lived, but I had to go all the way to Destin, FL for this gem:



No, I didn't whip out my camera in the middle of a crowded theater for this shot; we were the only 2 people in there at this point. This was one of the ads in the time-killer that starts about 20 minutes before the previews. The second website totally did me in - I was in danger of hyperventilation, I was laughing so hard.

Ya Ya and Le Le

Ya Ya takes a lunch break

Le Le takes a nap

Google has a sense of humor!

I saw this posted as a bulletin on myspace, and it made me laugh out loud, so I thought I would share it with the...7 or 8 people who happen across this blog.

Go to google.com

Click on maps

Click on Get Directions

From New York, New York

To Paris, France

Read line 23

Too lazy to do it yourself? Fine, I'll quote it here. Are you sitting down? Seriously, are you ready for this?

"Swim across the Atlantic Ocean - 3,462 mi - 29 days 0 hours"

I kid thee not.

maybe I spoke too soon

In a recent post, I mentioned that I don't watch "real" news programs because they are depressing. I have since learned the danger in speaking in absolutes. Last night as I was drifting in and out of consciousness on the couch, the local 9pm news woke me up. They have a little news ticker at the bottom of the screen like they're trying to be CNN or something, and a couple of things caught my eye (emphasis my own):

"Recall: 300,000 Craftsman Circular Saws are being recalled because they can cut you. Involves 7 1/4 inch saw."

They can cut you??? Seriously??? I'm assuming there really is some major malfunction in the saws (and not just in the minds of the general public who might be surprised to learn that a circular saw could cut you).

"The Disney Princesses Easter Baskets are being recalled due to a choking hazard."

Hubby's comment on this one? "Just don't eat the Disney Princesses. Problem solved."

Oy.

I love my job

5 year old: Ms Amber, I love you.

Me: I love you too.

5 year old: and when I go to kindergarten, I'll even still love you.

God, I love my job.