randomnosity

So I'm really not doing too well with the whole weekly life update thing, huh? Honestly, there's not really much to talk about. I figure as long as I post my weekend photo posts, that should be enough to attest to the fact that I am, in fact, still alive.

I'm still working at the same job, and still not really caring much for it. I now have more children on my roster than I am legally allowed to care for by myself and I still don't have an assistant. Because obviously when I voiced the fact that I was unable to deal with the class that I had, what I meant was please please oh please pile more of the darling little demons into my room.

Don't get me wrong. I still love working with kids. Just not here. Not without help. Not kids that are completely unfamiliar with the concept of adults actually being in charge.

Anyway, I tend to come home from work mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausted. Which makes it difficult to come up with coherent blog posts. Or anything else, for that matter. Tonight was the first time in quite some time that supper didn't involve fast food, macaroni and cheese, or chicken nuggets. And that was more because I had chicken in the fridge that needed to be used than because I actually felt like cooking. But that cheesy chicken and rice sure did hit the spot.

Ok, enough of my whining. I came across a couple of interesting tidbits on the internets last week that I had every intention of sharing. I just never got around to it until today. So it's all stuff you've probably seen already. But I'm going to post it anyway because this is my blog and I'll do what I want. So there ;)

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Students Questioned After Footage of Teen's Sex Act Distributed Around School - my favorite quote from the article: "Parents said yesterday the incident underlined the dangers of mobile phones in schools." Really? THAT'S what you want to focus on here? Alrighty then.

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Man Puts Entire Life Up For Auction - I'm actually curious to see how this one turns out.

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So that's what's going on here in the land of AZ lately. I'll try to do better about "real" posts. But I can't make any promises.

Really?

God Sued Over Pestilence and Terror

Nebraska lawmaker Ernie Chambers is has filed a lawsuit against God asking the court for a permanent injunction that would order God to cease certain destructive activities and "the making of terrorist threats." Chambers told local media he filed the suit to make a point about frivolous lawsuits frequently seen in US courts, citing a recent one against a judge.

Really, Mr Chambers? That's the best way you can come up with to make a point about frivolous lawsuits? Do you really want to take the chance of royally ticking off the Almighty? I mean, it seems to me you are just asking for Nebraska to be hit by an unprecedented tsunami or something. Honestly.

maybe I spoke too soon

In a recent post, I mentioned that I don't watch "real" news programs because they are depressing. I have since learned the danger in speaking in absolutes. Last night as I was drifting in and out of consciousness on the couch, the local 9pm news woke me up. They have a little news ticker at the bottom of the screen like they're trying to be CNN or something, and a couple of things caught my eye (emphasis my own):

"Recall: 300,000 Craftsman Circular Saws are being recalled because they can cut you. Involves 7 1/4 inch saw."

They can cut you??? Seriously??? I'm assuming there really is some major malfunction in the saws (and not just in the minds of the general public who might be surprised to learn that a circular saw could cut you).

"The Disney Princesses Easter Baskets are being recalled due to a choking hazard."

Hubby's comment on this one? "Just don't eat the Disney Princesses. Problem solved."

Oy.

Some things should go without saying...

And "toddlers should not smoke pot" is one of them. Further evidence to support my "people are morons" theory came to my attention last night. Evidently this 17 year old boy and his 18 year old friend thought it would be a hoot to get his 2 and 5 year old nephews to smoke some pot and catch the milestone moment on home video. What a fantastic idea. The video was found by police searching the home on a burglary warrant.

Astronaut Love Triangle

This news story has it all: astronauts, obsessive love, a BB gun, and diapers. Yes - diapers.

more weird holiday news

Ok, maybe this doesn't really qualify as news. It's a local radio ad. But it's just so crazy and out there I had to share it.

"For all your adult gift-giving needs..."

Now you can imagine how quickly the mind (especially one like mine) goes down that back alley. But here's the rest of the ad:

"visit H-town Home Furnishings! [blah blah blah]" Yes, you read (and I heard) correctly. They are talking about furniture. I think they need to rethink the wording in the ad personally.

'Tis the Season

The following news items are courtesy of MSNBC's Peculiar Postings section.

Fred Markoff's hot dog stand in suburban Chicago is selling a seasonal specialty - reindeer dogs. Just $8 buys you an Alaskan-made reindeer/pork/beef meat product on a bun with grilled onions and mustard. Is this the fate of the reindeer who do not become flyers for Team Santa?

Dillards South at the Great Lakes Mall in Mentor, Ohio was on fire last week - literallyand figuratively. It took 8 minutes to put out the electrical fire that burned circuits of a high-voltage electrical panel near a women's dressing room. Did that do any damage to that day's sales? Of course not. Holiday shoppers are a hardy bunch, and it will take more than a piddly electrical fire to chase them out of the store. The fire batallion chief said that they had to put people at the doors to keep more shoppers from coming in while they put the fire out. Does anyone else smell a fire sale?

A 12-year old boy was arrested on petty larceny charges in South Carolina. The rat-fink what sold him out? His mother. Apparently the boy had been rummaging through his great-grandmother's things when he found one of his Christmas presents - a Game Boy. He then "allegedly" took the toy from its hiding place and played it. Mom said, "It's not even about the Christmas present. I only want positive things out of it. ... There's no need for him to act this way. I'd rather call myself than someone else call for him doing something worse than this."

Randomness

Crazy Beautiful Stranger has a great post up about the rules that cats live by. It's all true. I've witnessed these behaviors in my own little furballs.

Sarah has learned a lot about Autumn that she never knew before - it's not all colorful leaves and pumpkin pies.

Bob and Sheri (the morning radio show I listen to while getting ready for work) provided a chance to share all that useless trivial knowledge you've stored up over the years this morning. Did you know that the male barnacle has the largest genitals, in proportion to body size, of any other planet?

Here's proof of what a classy state I live in. Honestly, people.

Evidently South Dakota's requirements for county commissioner do not include being alive.

Somebody lit a fire under this guy's butt (I couldn't resist)

looks good enough to eat

Check out this wedding dress - made of 1500 cream puffs! The 20 pound gown took the groom 2 months to complete. The bride actually wore the dress, complete with crown, bouquet, and necklace fashioned from caramelized sugar, to their wedding reception in Uzhhorod, Ukraine back in August. You can find the article here.

probably not what they were going for

Translation Error Leaves Tourism Brochure Denying City's Existance

A sightseeing brochure originally published in Hebrew was translated and redistributed in English. Tens of thousands of copies were distributed before city hall realized their blunder.

What they meant to say: "Jerusalem. There is no city like it!"

But the translation read: "Jerusalem. There is no such city!"

What NOT To Do

I try to keep up with the Peculiar Postings Section on MSNBC...it tends to be the only news that doesn't completely depress me. It's also a pretty good reminder (just in case you had forgotten) of how stupid people can be.

For example, take this gem of a mom. She admitted in court that she smoked marijuana with her 13 year old son, often as a reward for doing his homework. She's been doing it since he was 11, and she's also smoked with some of his older friends (now 17 and 18). Seems to me she had already smoked enough to kill a few too many brain cells to consider this an appropriate reward for a child to do his homework.

Or how about this dear old dad? He was just trying to help with his 10 year old daughter's fear of heights. His brilliant plan? Let's jump off a 15 foot bridge together into the water below. Why, father, that is a marvelous plan! I can't see any possible way this could go wrong! He held his daughter's hand and they jumped OFF A FREAKIN' BRIDGE!!! The kid's fine. Dad? Oh, he broke his leg. He wasn't charged with anything, since the girl jumped of her own free will. But officials from the state's Department of Child and Families plan to interview him. I should hope so. You know, there's one overused phrase that can never again be used in that household... "If someone told you to jump off a bridge..."

Problems I Wish I Had

I saw this article at msnbc this morning in the peculiar postings section.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/14292410/

Evidently this woman in West Virginia went home one day and someone had cleaned her house. Hubby said it wasn't him, as did everyone else she asked. She called the cops and they just laughed at her - can you blame them? A month later, she learns that a cleaning service had been hired by a neighbor with a similar house number, the same number of rooms to be cleaned, and a key hidden in a similar spot outside, and the cleaning lady had simply gone to the wrong house.

I think I'll start leaving the door unlocked and just pray really hard that the same thing will happen in my neighborhood.

How about you? Hear anyone complaining about a "problem" in their life that you wish you had?